Eloping Etiquette: Here’s Everything You Need To Know

Updated 11/8/2024

If you and your partner have decided to ditch the idea of a traditional wedding, the idea of eloping may come to mind, and it’s no mystery why: eloping is affordable, eco-friendly, and generally a more relaxed and casual affair. But just because you’re not having a sit-down dinner for 200 doesn’t mean that there aren’t any rules to follow. While the steps you need to take for your elopement day are arguably easier than a larger wedding, there is such a thing as eloping etiquette. Elopement announcement etiquette can help to avoid feelings of guilt over not inviting your loved ones, and can help you take the right steps towards having friends and family feel included, even if they can’t be a part of the celebration on your wedding day.

Tell Your Family and Friends

If you’ve decided that eloping is right for you and you’re opting not to have guests, filling your loved ones in on your plans might be a good idea. When it comes to announcing your elopement, how you break the news matters. Immediate family and close friends should hear the big news directly from you, either in person or over the phone. This personal touch shows that you value their presence in your life, even if they weren’t present at your private ceremony. For a broader announcement, consider mailing out formal wedding announcements.

The best thing to do is be open and share your reasons why you’re choosing to elope. Whether you want to save money, reduce your carbon footprint, or you simply don’t enjoy being in the spotlight, if you’re honest with why you’re eloping, chances are your loved ones will be more understanding. If they don’t react the way you expected, just know that that’s OK, too. Kindly remind them that, while you are empathetic towards how they feel about the situation, the decision comes down to the two people who are choosing to commit themselves to each other.

Remember that telling them about your decision is not a requirement, and ultimately, if you choose to not tell a single soul before your big day, that’s your prerogative! Just be mindful to navigate sharing the elopement plans with your loved ones delicately.

Send a Save the Date

If you’re choosing to tell friends and family beforehand, a thoughtful way to keep them in the loop is by sending a Save the Date. While this typically differs from a traditional Save the Date, you can still send some details about your elopement ceremony. Telling your loved ones your elopement plans can help make them feel connected to your big day, even if they’re not going to be in attendance. While this piece of elopement etiquette isn’t always necessary, it does take an extra step towards ensuring the people in your life that you do want them to play a small role in your wedding, even if that means simply chatting with them or getting together before you tie the knot.

Send a Marriage Announcement

Announcing your elopement is a thrilling moment, and one thoughtful way to do so is with a personalized elopement announcement card. These cards serve as both an announcement and a keepsake for your family and friends. Whether you prefer a formal or casual style, the key is to let your elopement announcement reflect your unique love story. Consider including a favorite photo from your elopement day, along with wedding announcement wording that feels personal and heartfelt.

When crafting your wedding announcement wording, it’s essential to keep the tone true to your style as a couple. The key is to ensure the wording reflects the excitement of your elopement day. Below are a few examples of wedding announcement wording to inspire you:

• “We eloped! With great joy, we announce our marriage on [wedding date] in an intimate ceremony. Stay tuned for our post-elopement celebration!”
• “Just married! We tied the knot in a private ceremony and can’t wait to celebrate with you soon.”
• “We said ‘I do’ in an intimate elopement on [wedding date]. Join us for a celebration on [reception date]!”

Be sure to send your wedding announcement cards soon after your elopement, allowing enough time for guests to plan if you’re hosting a reception.

You may have friends and family ask if they can buy you a celebratory gift. If you have a registry, it may be worth adding that onto your announcement, especially if you’re hosting a gathering to celebrate your marriage. Which brings us to our next eloping etiquette tip.

Host a Post-Ceremony Celebration

Call it a post-elopement party, reception, dinner, or just a casual party at your home. Your friends and family are going to want to celebrate and toast to your marriage — so let them! Eloping with family doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive. It simply is a way of thanking your loved ones for supporting your decision to elope and is a chance to soak in a little bit of newlywed bliss. Your reception is also a great chance to share the story of your day with everyone, and to show off any elopement photos or videos that were taken.

Send Thank-You’s

Whether someone purchased an item from your registry or simply popped over with a bottle of champagne to celebrate, sending a thank-you is proper eloping etiquette — much like a traditional wedding. Handwriting an appreciative note thanking your friends and family for their thoughtfulness and generosity will always be the right thing to do, no matter how involved they were in your day. Heck, even sending a thank-you to anyone who was encouraging and understanding of your decision to elope isn’t a bad idea. If you have people around you who love you, show your love back with a simple gesture. That way, they can look back on your elopement experience with the same amount of love that you and your new spouse do.

Ready to Make Your Day Truly Yours with Simply Eloped

Ultimately, eloping is all about embracing a unique and intimate experience that speaks to your love story. By considering family, friends, and the personal touches that matter to you, you’re crafting a day that reflects who you are as a couple. From communicating with loved ones to planning a celebration that’s all your own, staying mindful of these etiquette tips can help create a special, memorable experience.

At Simply Eloped, we know the most important thing is that your elopement feels true to you—filled with love, joy, and unforgettable memories. Learn more about our all-inclusive elopement packages today.

Written by Karen Norian

Karen Norian is an elopement photographer and has photographed over a hundred elopements. Karen has also worked as an elopement planner for Simply Eloped. She's been quoted in the New York Times, Brides, Hello Giggles, Bustle, Yahoo, and more.